Better Think Tanking #10
Equalize Your Feedback
“Our research shows that even if it is ostensibly positive, feedback provided to women tends to be less actionable and less useful for leadership progression than feedback given to men, making it less likely that women will advance to more senior positions.”
Bad: women tend to get less specific developmental feedback than men do, hindering their path to leadership. Good: Elena Doldor, Madeleine Wyatt, and Jo Silvester have taken a closer look at the differences and propose changes:
Instead of telling women to implement other people’s visions, encourage them to develop their own. Instead of solely promoting big-picture-thinking among men, encourage them to develop an eye for operational details.
Instead of telling women to toughen up and network horizontally, encourage them to negotiate, network vertically, and proactively approach key players. Encourage men to build alliances not only with seniors but also with peers.
Encourage women to reach for leadership positions and pursue development opportunities. Encourage men to develop collaboration and team-oriented skills.
Instead of telling women to “be more confident,” give them the same concrete guidance for specific skills (managing meetings, communicating with different audiences) that men receive.
It’s good practice to review and compare the feedback you provide to women* and men and encourage workplace skills traditionally associated with each gender in everyone. This helps overcome the gendered division of tasks and roles we experience at work.
Aim For Diverse Quotes, Not Diversity Quota
“If the opinions of all ages, colours, backgrounds, experiences, stances and genders are included, the conversation gets more interesting and relevant. And if new voices are added, new answers will be provided and more people will feel represented.”
In all honesty: If a panel with male experts has a female moderator, we will still consider it a manel. What’s worse, too many events are just full of rigid talking points and plain boring.
Rogier Elshout and Beatriz Rios of the moderators collective moderating.eu are sick of constant requests to send female token moderators. Yes, many seniors are still middle-aged white men. But rather than designing a panel with quota, they suggest asking yourself: How do we get an (interesting) rainbow of opinions?
Their advice: Let people speak because they’re relevant, not because they’re important. Don’t go for the hotshots, opt for the interesting voices. Already have inside voices? Enrich the debate with outsiders or challengers. Why not add people from the work floor, volunteers, or entrepreneurs?
As long as events are very formal, “high-testosterone,” and full of inside jokes, and as long as speakers are announced as authorities instead of fresh voices, this will be difficult to realize. But more relaxed conferences that are “less about statements and more about dialogue,” will attract more diverse speakers and be “more relevant, fun and productive.” (Check out BTT#6 for inclusive moderation guidance.)
We agree with the authors: This may save us from having the same boring panels with white, middle-aged women executives in a few years’ time.
Men Sharing Allyship Advice? Yes, Please!
If we had one wish, it’d be that all men reading this newsletter gave this podcast episode a listen. Brad Johnson and David Smith wrote a book full of tips on becoming an ally for women* at work and we couldn’t feel more understood. Want to learn how?
Start at home. How equal is your partnership, the child care, mental work?
Learn to listen when a colleague shares her frustrations. Then, don’t try fixing or worse gaslighting her, and don’t jump to assumptions about what could help her, even if well-intended. Ask instead.
Hold yourself and others (leadership, team, peers) accountable when they apply unequal standards. And remember: inappropriate comments about colleagues are always inappropriate, not only when they’re in the room.
Be alert and refocus attention that is often automatically directed to men to women who are more qualified to answer a question, give an interview, etc.
Check the structures: do you have a gender pay gap (try regular salary audits!), equal opportunity recruitment and hiring processes, fair performance indicators?
It takes practice to realize, understand, and act upon inequality and yes, it’s hard to speak up. Thanks to all men who’re already allies. We see you and appreciate it!
Breaking The Silence About Mental Health
Theresa spoke at “Breaking the Silence: Addressing the Stigma Around Mental Health” this month. She discussed ways of approaching mental health issues in the foreign policy and security community with Jasmine El-Gamal, Joseph El-Khoury, and Diana Rayes and shared personal experiences and advice on mental health in the workplace (see BTT#5 on the topic).
We’re grateful for Jasmine courageously speaking up about her mental illness last year and initiating the event to bring the topic into the spotlight and start building a support system among us. Theresa is happy to be approached if you feel the need to talk to someone. Here are some takeaways from the event:
Working on security issues should be considered high risk for mental health conditions. No matter how resilient or informed you think you are, working on war crimes or human rights abuses can take a toll. Employers, look out for your staff!
It’s scary to speak about your mental illness in the early years of your career. Seniors, speak up! It is encouraging to hear your stories and you can use your positions to help dismantle stigmatization.
Think about how your mental illness affects your colleagues, especially when you’re in a position of power and responsible for others.
Find a colleague or person that works in the same field you can confide in and talk about your challenges. They may understand the reality in which you have to navigate your illness better than family and friends or even your therapist.
German: Kritische Männerarbeit
Markus Theunert und Matthias Luterbach verfolgen als Vertreter kritischer Männerarbeit das Ziel, Alternativen zu vorherrschenden Männlichkeitsnormen zu fördern und die herrschende Geschlechter-/Herrschaftsordnung aufzubrechen. Nicht nur können progressive männerpolitische Akteure Frauen* unterstützen, sie können ebenso männliche Anliegen und Verletzlichkeiten in den Diskurs einbringen.
Trotz überragender Privilegien, bringen gesellschaftliche Erwartungshaltungen auch für Männer Druck und Leid mit sich. Es hilft, sich darüber auszutauschen und offen für von der Norm abweichende Vorstellungen von Geschlecht und Männlichkeit zu sein. Männlichkeit ist veränderbar und bestehende Strukturen keine Selbstverständlichkeit.
Think Tank School and Community Challenge
Our colleagues at the Think Tank Lab invite early-career think-tankers based in Germany to apply to their four-month-long Think Tank School that equips participants with career skills. They also call for applications for two Community Challenges on fostering diversity and improving the onboarding experiences of new think tank staff. The application deadline is August 8!
What We Are Thinking About
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Thanks again to Sophie and Emma for curating the last issue. We’re excited to welcome another guest editor next month!
Enjoy the summer,
Theresa & Sarah